Journal 6.8.22 5.05 pm

Dear Journal, 
Just watched half of Shutter Island and it reminded me of grim days. Days when I was without any reason hospitalised, manhandled in the hospital, seeing things that will stay with me for life. 
Through ages there have been things written on the way people have been used for psychomedical experiments. Psychiatry is nonsense. I've seen people being beaten up. I myself have been manhandled, shouted at by psychotic nurses and tranquilised to numbness. Once in, there is no saying when you will get out. 
On one stay, a warden told me about the patients there. One man he said was in because of a property fight. I saw a young girl fighting to not be locked up, the way I have been in the past. I then saw her sometime later being forcibly tied to the bed post, in open view, for all to see. The warden told me her husband wanted this for her. 
Against all odds I have a family who intends well for me and wishes me no harm. For that I'll always be grateful. 
On one occassion I saw a 13-14 year-old boy being locked up forcibly by the wardens. He meekly looked to his parents for support but no support was forthcoming for him. His parents walked away. All this can have a deep psychological impact. It's scary to be treated that way. My family has been told things like I'm a danger to society. It can shake them. 
I am grateful that Dr Rao has never hospitalised me. May be I'm too harsh on him. It's a big thing because earlier I've been locked up for no reason. Well, there have also been times when there were reasons. Too painful to spill it all in one post. 
Shilpa cancelled class today. Hope Rakhi goes well. To finish all my day's tasks. 
Regards, 
Me. 

Comments